Can A Child Focus?

In the old days, it was expected that kids would know to be seen and not heard.

Developmental science has come a long way since then, and these days we understand that the concepts of discipline and focus actually take time to learn. The perceived lack of focus in younger kids can be physical, intellectual, emotional, or social expressions of challenges they are facing.

If we can better understand the challenges, we can better help the kids grow past them. Here are some of the challenges our younger ninjas might be facing:

Physically, kids’ bodies are growing, and their bodies often don’t have the strength necessary to hold them still for very long. Imagine if you had to sit still while holding very heavy buckets of water in both hands. You’d wiggle too.

Intellectually, kids are natural scientists. They want to observe, interact, extrapolate, and experiment.

Imagine seeing so many cool things all at once, then not being allowed to acknowledge them because you are supposed to be focusing… kind of how we try to avoid the leftover Halloween candy by hiding in them in a cabinet so we can stay on our diet.  How’s that going for you, by the way?

Emotionally, kids sometimes struggle with labeling and regulating their feelings. This causes their emotions to take charge while leaving the rational thought processes that would allow them to stay focused out of the equation.

We all have those grumpy days where we just can’t focus at work. Our minds are often somewhere else. This is exactly the same for children. Sometimes what we think isn’t a big deal is the end of the world for them.

A great book that covers the science behind this in an understandable and easily applicable way is The Whole-Brain Child by Dr. Daniel Siegel and Dr. Tina Payne Bryson.

Socially, kids are very aware of their peers, but they don’t always have the experience necessary to understand what they see.

They wonder why Jimmy gets a turn but they don’t, or why Kathy is wearing a different shirt today. They aren’t “not focusing.” Quite the opposite, they are trying very hard to discover their place in the social structure.

Their actions and vocalizations are simply their quest to gain answers and insight when they don’t understand.  Most times, behaviors are just an attempt to communicate.  It is up to us to facilitate that communication.

So can a young child focus?

Absolutely!  It just might not manifest in a very adult way… but then… they aren’t just little adults!